The Turds

Ex-smelly-arse-mus! Harry Plopper, the gifted wiz-turd has arrived on his nippy Firebutt Bumstick.

You know that when the sh*t's gonna hit the fan all you can do is sit back, let it happen and maybe enjoy a cup of tea whilst you're at it.

Even harder to catch than his visible counterpart! The Stealth Predaturd is extremely rare and very highly collectible, so sniff him out and get him while you can!

The Turd world isn't all fun and games; there is a dark side as well, and this is where Smellboy comes in. Hailing from the Forbidden Zone, Smellboy's quest is to kick the crap out of any evil sh*t that appears!

Turdinator Poo is even more fearsome than his original counterpart, The Turdinator. Your future lies in his hands.

Yo ho ho and a bottle of bum! Welcome to the latest pirate to battle the rim; Will Turder!

Smellraiser; the scariest sh*t ever found in the bowels of the Turd World. With a limited production run of only 5000, get him while you can!

Hero of many famous adventures, most notably Raiders of the Lost Arse, Rimdiana Jones is available for you to buy complete with poseable whip and crystal dung skull!

Watch out! This mad super-scientist could well be behind pooooo!

Get your hands on Rimbo while you can. This hard as nails sh*t is a limited edition Turd from the 2006 collection, with a production run of just 5000.

Scarfaece, real name Tony Bowltana, is a high flying sh*t in the murky world of drug dealing and organised crime.

Mr Brown is one of the meanest Turds in town. As the right hand man to the Bogfather, you wouldn't want to mess with this fully loaded Turd.

David Crapham, world renowned shatball player, is the best looking Turd around, and he knows it!

He's a baaaaaad mother-crapper! Whifty Scent tries to keep his arse clean, but there's always some cack addicted turdette with a kiss and smell story keeping him in the headlines.

Part of the Turds 2007 collection, Scoop Doggy Poo is such a cool sh*t that he's almost frozen!

The blingest Turd in the pan, Poo Diddy, internationally renowned crap star, really is the Top of the Plops.

Do you know someone who can barely tell their arse from their elbow in the bedroom? Then the Sh*te Lover Trophy is an ideal gift for them!

Do you know someone who can barely tell their arse from their elbow in the kitchen? Then the Sh*te Cook Trophy is an ideal gift for them!

Do you know someone who can barely tell their arse from their elbow when behind the wheel of a car? Then the Sh*te Driver Trophy is an ideal gift for them!

Do you know someone who can barely tell their arse from their elbow on the football pitch? Then the Sh*te Footballer Trophy is an ideal gift for them!

Sh*tfaced is one of the earliest Turds produced, and therefore highly collectible. From the 2003 range, he likes nothing more than to get high!

Sh*tfaced Again has come along way since he was simply Sh!tfaced; now he smokes his doo through a pipe for the ultimate hit.

The Sh*tfaced Ashtray is a flushed item, and is highly collectible, making it a perfect present, either for yourself or a fan!

Julius Squeezer; possibly the most famous Empooror of the old Turd World went down the pan in history. He is here as part of the Turds 2006 collection.

The most hapless and frankly useless of all Turd detectives, No Sh*t Sherlock would get everywhere and under everyone's feet. He would stick to a problem like poo until the public got bored and wandered home.

The ultimate emo Turd on the block, Weird Sh*t has made depression something of a fart form. He loves to look different, and hates everyone around him!

Get some proper girl power with Bird Sh*t; she's the Chav Queen of Turds.

Being married to Bird Sh*t would be enough to make any one tough, but this piece of crap has taken it to the extreme!

Part of the Turds 2005 collection, this charming little sh*t is a totally devoted turdettes' favourite!

What a cruddy pair of little sh*ts! These guys steal anything that's not bolted down, and would happily try to steal anything that is!

Everyone knows how it feels to be chained to the office day in, day out. Same Sh*t Different day is the perfect depiction of the dullness of office work whether on earth or in Turdsville.

No Turd is immortal as this little piece of plop proves. One day he was working in the corporate world, he gossiped to the wrong people, and now the Sh*t Has Hit The Fan.

The diarrhoea of the Turd World, surviving on a diet of raw crappy food is one of the many reasons Sick Sh*t is always ill.

This unlucky little pile of poo gets all the worst luck, but hey! After all! Sh*t Happens!

As part of the Turds 2006 collection, Sh*t For Brains really looks up to his idols such as The Elephant Pan and Frankenstrain. They remind him of himself; a sad, lonely piece of crap.

Arriba! Arriba! Get down and dirty with the wildest poo in the west!

Arse Bandit is a special limited edition Turd; with only 5000 produced you better get in there quick!

Bad Sh*t is part of the Turds 2007 range, and is a staunch reminder to us all of what 'the morning after the night before' looks like. Been there, done that!

Bazturd is a proper mean, nasty son of bum. Don't cross him, if you do it's likely to be the last thing you'll ever poo.

Part of the popular Turds 2007 range, Bullsh*tter is a proper cheeky little arse; he'll do literally anything to get his filthy hands on your cash!

Log On, the ultimate geeky piece of plop, is, by day a hard working nurse from Stainsfield Hospital. By night the ultimate Rim Trek geek!

Put in the nicest possible way, Nutty is the most insane and twisted sh*t you could ever have the pleasure of meeting.

What a charming fellow! We've all seen Pebble Dash; he's the 'Englishman Abroad' Turd that likes to hang out on beaches, burning himself to a crisp whilst gently marinading in a cocktail of lager and shots.